10 years ago...
Current mood: wanted
Category: Life
Wow...it's incredible to me that today is 8/31/08...usually I get sentimental around the 13th for obvious reasons, but today I'm choosing to reflect on something far greater...you see, ten years ago today, I made a decision as a member of Prayer Temple COGIC to be baptized...Yes, I went down in the water...and the water was cold...lol...My mother and youngest brother were there...In fact, my ex was baptized (prolly for the 2nd or 3rd time lol) on the same day...as were my god-kids father and several other members of the church...
So anyway...I remembered late last night (early this morning) as I was going to bed that today is an historic day for me...It was the day I chose to publicly proclaim that I was (symbolically) buried and raised with Christ...becoming a new creature in Him...I don't want to get into the doctrine and history and traditions of the church...but that essentially explains it...{Side story...lol...For those of you with kids, let me tell you there is nothing like the pride and joy that swells up when your child makes that decision on their own...my youngest stepson, Marvin, decided to get baptized at the age of 7/8 when we lived in South Carolina...he went to our church with Jess & Quinn because Andre and I had to attend another service elsewhere...and when we got home and found out what he did...wow...amazing...}
I wanted to figure out where I was physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually at that point so I could compare it with where I am today...I know I was on an emotional roller coaster then because my grandfather had passed away the week before and I was dating this guy who worked at Gander Hill (the jail my son was at...weird)...I was in school at UD, living on campus in the Towers...waitressing at the Diner...and singing with UDGC...
Now, I am still in school, still waitressing, still singing, though all at different places...I haven't had any deaths in the family, but my mom is headed for a divorce and my sister won't speak to me no matter how nice I am to her...I've been on a stressful ride the past few months with transferring schools, and moving and not having my truck anymore...
I wonder what will happen over the next few months in relation to what took place shortly after my baptism...I stopped dating the prison guard and began dating my ex a month later...I had my second miscarriage 2 months later...I got engaged 9 months later and married just shy of a year after my baptism...I don't foresee anything similar happening in the next year...but who knows...I did just stop dating someone and I was approached about getting married twice yesterday...lol...(first by one of the sexy cooks at work to get his greencard...lol....and secondly by an ex who finally realized what he is missing....aww lol)
What have I learned in the past 10 years that will help me in the next ten?? I definitely need not make decisions only with my heart...I need to finish this degree instead of letting someone else's plan dictate my life...I need to be able to stand on my own two feet rather than depend on someone else...I need to seek God first...in all things...and let HIM direct my path...I need to let go of those who don't want me in their lives and hold on to those who do...
It always sounds good on paper...lol...
Love y'all....
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